Show Me Some Love!

When I started my current job back in March of 2009, I had to participate in many trainings. Some had to do with safety on the job, how to fill out paperwork and all other kinds of skills that are pertinent to my line of work. I particularly remember one training in which the purpose of it was to foster a sense of caring and affection between coworkers. We had to hold hands, sing and be completely honest and truthful with one another about various topics. In my training there were five people and I didn't know any of them and they didn't know me. We were all new to the company and trying to establish how we fit in. At the end of the training, there was an exercise where all of us had to embrace one another and hug. I had a big problem with this. As I mentioned, I didn't know these people and the instructor was telling me that I had to hug everyone in the training. I didn't know about everyone else, but it wasn't going to happen with me. I raised my hand and I told the instructor that I would sit out of this exercise. I could tell that she became annoyed but then she said, "fine". So, I went along with the rest of the exercise but when it came time to hug, I didn't. I could sense the instructors irritation with me but I didn't care.
Now, fast forward about eight months. I'm sitting in the office and a coworker that I have gotten to know closely, who was in that training with me came over to talk to me. I got up, extended my arms and we hugged. Then I hear, "Excuse me? YOU are giving someone a hug?" This was said from a male coworker who was also in the training with me and seemed to take offense that I refused to hug him. When he said that statement, I turned around and told him that my hugs are reserved for people I feel comfortable with and who I have established a relationship or bond. He immediately became embarrassed and said, "I know, I know...I was just joking." I could tell that he was not joking by the way he presented his thoughts.
I take hugging to be a form of intimacy. My body is pressed against another persons and we are exchanging a form of affection. Just like kissing, this display of love is not for everyone. I am very careful with who I give my heart to and I don't take it lightly. Hugs to me are sacred. If I hug you upon meeting you or leaving that means that I value a part of you and that I have made some connection with you in a way. In that training, I didn't have a connection with any of those people.
I always become bothered when I meet parents who force their children to hug strangers upon meeting them. If a child doesn't feel comfortable with hugging someone, why force them? Maybe it's their own internal sense of intuition telling them that a certain person doesn't feel safe to them and they need to back away. Hugging isn't for everyone. It's an expression of love and I am very careful about who I choose to be around me and who I love. Many people have an issue with this idea but that's not my problem, it's theirs.